Kangana baring her soul, don't see it as publicity: Mehta

Mumbai, Jun 16: In the wake of Sushant Singh Rajput's death, veteran actor Deepti Naval has opened up about her struggle with depression and suicidal thoughts in the early 90s.

Naval shared a poem that she wrote during her struggle with depression on her Facebook page after paying tributes to Rajput, who was found hanging in his Bandra apartment on Sunday at the age of 34.

According to a police official, Mumbai Police found out during the probe that the actor was under medication for depression

"Dark days these... So much has been happening - mind has come to a point of stillness... Or rather numbness. Today I feel like sharing a poem I wrote back in the years when I was fighting depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts - Yes, fighting... and like how," Naval wrote.

The 68-year-old actor made her debut with Shyam Benegal's 1978 "Junoon" and went on to feature in films like "Chashme Buddoor", "Ankahee", "Mirch Masala", Saath Saath among others in the 80s.

Naval's poem, titled "Black Wind", begins by describing how anxiety engulfs a person.

"Anxiety grips me with both hands, spiked claws dig deep into my soul I gasp for breath and stagger around sharp corners of my single bed.."

In the poem, Naval talks about fighting suicidal thoughts and depression, describing it as a "ghoulish lust" she won't succumb to.

"The telephone rings... no, it stops...God damn! Why don't anyone speak? A voice, Just a human voice In this shameless, pitiless Abyss of the night - gloom deepens into darkness, turns purple I feel dark inside."

The actor ends by writing that she will survive the night, its "deathly design" and fight.

"The world's a snake pit, so let it be! I dare the devil to get the better of me! Deepti Naval, Night of July 28, 1991."

In an interview with PTI last year, Naval had mentioned how acting assignments started to thin in the late 90s and as a "serious actor" it was "devastating" to be ignored.

Nalgonda,  Jul 5: Bollywood filmmaker Ram Gopal Varma has been booked in connection with his upcoming film 'Murder' which is based on Pranay Kumar's murder in Nalgonda district.

Ram Gopal Varma was booked following Nalgonda court's directive on a petition filed by father of a man who was killed in an alleged honour killing incident in Miryalaguda in 2018.

"We have booked filmmaker Ram Gopal Varma following a court order for his upcoming movie 'Murder', which is based on sensational caste-based Pranay Kumar's murder that occurred in Miryalguda, Nalgonda District in September 2018, " Police said.

On June 21, the filmmaker has released the poster of 'Murder', based on a true story.
Police said, "Pranay's father Balaswamy has filed a petition in Nalgonda Court stating that the film will affect the on-going trial of Pranay's murder case and the film should be stalled."

"We've registered a case under relevant section of SC/ST (Prevention of Atrocities) Amendment Act and taken up investigation."

"The court has ordered Nalgonda police to register a case against the film director Ram Gopal Varma and the producer," added the police.

Jaipur, Jan 24: Actor Sonali Bendre has said that she came into the movies to make money but fell in love with the profession where she discovered herself and found her family and friends. The 45-year-old actor said she owed a lot to Bollywood which is the most wonderful place to be, both mentally as well as creatively.

"I came into movies to make money and I fell in love with the profession. It was the most wonderful place to be, mentally and creatively," she said.

"I found myself there, found my friends and family over there. I owe a lot to Bollywood. It was one of the most wonderful things that happened to me," Sonali said here on Thursday.

The actor said her entry into movies by purely because she happened to be at the right place and at the right time.

Sonali added when acting offers came her way she knew that in no other field could she have made as much money, and as quickly, as she did in movies.

"Basically, I got into this because it was great money," she said.

The actor was speaking at the Jaipur Literature Festival and also talked about books and how her book club named ‘Sonali's Book Club' came into being.

Sonali, who has been convalescing after undergoing treatment for cancer in the US, said that books gave her strength and kept her afloat while she was going through one of the toughest phases of her life.

The actor was diagnosed with high grade cancer in July 2018 and underwent treatment for it in New York.

"Books were my friends other than my sisters while I was growing up. I'm nowhere remotely connected to movies. I have a very middle class Maharashtrian upbringing. When I got into movies, it was like being on another planet. Again in this world where it was easy to feel the peer pressure and do certain things or not do certain things, or look a certain way, books kept me grounded," she said.

"'A Gentleman in Moscow' (a 2016 novel by Amor Towles) was uplifting and I got so much strength from that book during my treatment in New York," Sonali said.

The actor, who often shares posts about books and authors on social media, said one should stop feeling guilty about not completing a book.

"Sometimes you start judging yourself by not completing a book, but I have reached a stage where I understand that I'm a book-lover, but that doesn't mean I will like all the books. It's okay if you don't like a book," she said.

Sonali also said that nobody wanted to know about the intellectual capacity of Bollywood stars as it was not "entertainment enough or gossipy enough".

Earlier before her session, Sonali launched author Ashwin Sanghi's latest book ‘The Vault of Vishnu', the sixth book in the Bharat series, at the 13th edition of the festival.