Satyamev Jayate: Ugly dowry truths of big fat Indian weddings

May 20, 2012

sathya_copy


Eighty per cent of the bank loans are taken by people to meet dowry demands. One woman dies every hour in our country in dowry related cases. On Sunday, May 20, Aamir Khan brought home the ugly truths about giving and accepting dowry in our big fat Indian weddings.


Aamir spoke to several victims, community leaders and even a politician to get to the bottom of the issue. The truth was as unpalatable as it was horrific. Balwant Singh Ramoowalia, President of the Lok Bhalai Party in Punjab, who came on as a guest on the show through video conferencing, said close to 30,000 women in his state are languishing at their in-laws, being forced to do backbreaking menial labour because their parents were too poor to meet the dowry demands of their in-laws.


Every parent wished to see their daughter settled comfortably in a happy marriage and Paramjeet's were no exception. She had not met his future husband until after her engagement. After accepting a lot of money, including his education fees for a course he applied for in Australia, Paramjeet's husband kept the pressure on her middle class parents to send more. One day his family insisted that she grant him divorce over the internet having milked them dry.


Equally heartbreaking is the story of Komal who was left to starve in the US and locked out of her home in the November chill by her husband who was dissatisfied by the dowry he received from her parents, who spent Rs 60 lakh on jewellery.

While Komal escaped with her life by dialling the US Women's Shelter, there are several others who gave their lives to the ugly trend.


Kishore Tiwari of the Vidharva Jan Andolan Samiti spoke of the debt burden on farmers who are pressured to take loans to meet the demands of greedy in laws at the time of their daughters' marriage. When the discussion was bordering on the grim, Aamir highlighted the case of Santosh and Ruby, a couple whose strange tale of marriage brought some comic relief.


Santosh was kidnapped by Ruby's family to avoid having to pay dowry and forced to marry her within the confines of their home. He himself dubbed it 'pakadwa vivah' and said though he was outraged at that time, he came to love his simple wife who took great care of his aged mother.


But for Rani Tripathi, it was a brave move to show up a family of dowry takers in front of millions of people. She not only refused to pay dowry for her marriage but went a step further and launched a sting operation against the family that demanded a car and Rs 5 lakh in cash from them.


Rani found a sensible and loving match in Pawan who shook a leg with Aamir to Sona Mahapatra's lilting rendition, 'Mujhe Kya Bechega Rupaiyya' at the end of the show. Durlov Baruah, an Assamese, spoke about Assam's dowry-free status and a local cleric of Burhanpur claimed it had the same status over many years. Marriages in Burhanpur are held without pomp and show and without dowry.


It was Aamir's impassioned appeal to people to spend money on their children's education rather than on their dowry that brought the curtains down on a show that has become the Sunday habit of millions.



Comments

Add new comment

  • Coastaldigest.com reserves the right to delete or block any comments.
  • Coastaldigset.com is not responsible for its readers’ comments.
  • Comments that are abusive, incendiary or irrelevant are strictly prohibited.
  • Please use a genuine email ID and provide your name to avoid reject.
Agencies
January 6,2020

Kochi, Jan 6: A trial court on Monday framed charges against Malayalam film actor Dileep and other accused in the case of alleged abduction and molestation of a south Indian actress in 2017.

The actor and nine other accused were present in the additional special sessions court in Ernakulamwhen the charges were framed against them.

All of them have denied the charges.

On Saturday, the Court had dismissed a plea filed by Dileep, seeking to exclude him from the list of accused.

The Court had admitted the prosecution argument that there is prima facie evidence against him in the crime and dismissed the plea of the actor, who is eighth accused in the case.

The court had also not allowed a plea by the actor to grant him 10 days time to file the appeal in a higher court in the light of the Supreme Court order in November 2019 that the trial should be completed in six months.

The court is hearing the case in-camera.

On December 19, Dileep, along with his lawyers and a technical expert, had examined the contents of the electronic records at the closed room of the court.

Earlier, the Supreme Court had directed that the actor be allowed to inspect the records to enable him to present an effective defence during the trial.

In February 2017, the actress was allegedly abducted and molested by the accused.

Seven people, including the key accused 'Pulsar' Suni were arrested in connection with the actress' abduction case.

There are 10 accused in the case.

The entire act had allegedly taken place in a moving vehicle, which was filmed by the accused to blackmail her.

Dileep was subsequently arrested and arrayed as an accused in connection with offences under provisions of the Indian Penal Code and IT Act.

The top court had directed that the trial in case be concluded expeditiously, preferably within six months from the date of the judgement.

A woman judge is hearing the case.

In February 2019, the High Court, while considering a plea seeking to transfer the case to a Sessions Court headed by a woman judge to conduct the trial, had ordered the CBI special court Judge-III Ernakulam Honey M Varghese to complete the trial expeditiously.

Comments

Add new comment

  • Coastaldigest.com reserves the right to delete or block any comments.
  • Coastaldigset.com is not responsible for its readers’ comments.
  • Comments that are abusive, incendiary or irrelevant are strictly prohibited.
  • Please use a genuine email ID and provide your name to avoid reject.
News Network
January 30,2020

Mumbai, Jan 30: A day after a woman filed a complaint against Ganesh Acharya alleging that he had forced her to watch pornography, actor Tanushree Dutta said Bollywood should boycott the choreographer.

A 33-year-old woman, an assistant choreographer, has written to the National Commission for Women (NCW) alleging that Acharya used to make her watch porn videos whenever she visited his office in suburban Andheri.

She also alleged that Acharya and two women assaulted her during a function of the Indian Film and Television Choreographers Association (IFTCA) held in suburban Andheri on Sunday. A complaint has been filed in this regard with Amboli police.

"It's time Bollywood and the other Indian film industries boycott choreographer Ganesh Acharya completely. Hiding behind the male superstars who work with this despicable man, he has been abusing his power and position to harass, bully and take advantage of vulnerable young newcomers to the industry," Dutta said in a statement here.

Dutta had alleged that her co-star Nana Patekar harassed and misbehaved with her while shooting for a song for their 2008 film "Horn Ok Pleasss", and Acharya, who was the choreographer, introduced new steps which were "intimate".

Recalling the trauma she faced, Tanushree said even though Acharya was party to all the harassment she faced on the 'Horn ok Pleasss" set, he went on to spoil her name and reputation.

"Nobody had any regard for me and how much I had suffered psychologically and financially because of the turmoil I went though due to these people. I left the industry because I was so scared and hurt over the atrocious treatment meted out to me on 'Horn ok Pleasss' set.

"I had worked very sincerely to get to where I got in life and so went in shock for many years, over the whole episode on that set almost 12 years ago, that led to an attack on my car. They didn't just break my car, they broke my spirit that day," Dutta said, in reference to the attack on her car in 2008.

She expressed her displeasure over how "leading men" and "heroes" of Bollywood continued working with Acharya, whose most recent work includes "Simmba", "Zero", "Sanju" among others.

"Even after all the information of fraud, non payment of dues, sexual harassment of dancers, bullying and intimidation and even physical abuse of dancers is coming out about Ganesh Acharya in the media, if the actors, directors and producers still work with him, it would mean that they themselves are engaging in such acts also.

"It's a warning to the film industry to stay the hell away from Ganesh Acharya otherwise your own reputation will be joined to his character. I'm sure many more girls and boys will come out about his misbehaviour and shady business, opening floodgates in the future," she added.

Comments

Add new comment

  • Coastaldigest.com reserves the right to delete or block any comments.
  • Coastaldigset.com is not responsible for its readers’ comments.
  • Comments that are abusive, incendiary or irrelevant are strictly prohibited.
  • Please use a genuine email ID and provide your name to avoid reject.
Agencies
June 15,2020

Mumbai, Jun 15: Actor Sushant Singh Rajput's death has reignited the discussions around the struggle of survival in Bollywood, with many insiders highlighting "cruel and unforgiving" nature of the industry, particularly tough on outsiders.

Rajput was found hanging in his Bandra apartment on Sunday.

According to a police official, Mumbai Police found out during the probe that the 34-year-old actor was under medication for depression.

An engineering student, Rajput left his course at the Delhi Technological University in the early 2000s and rose from a background dancer to a TV star with soap opera Pavitra Rishta, which gave the "outsider" his breakout show in 2009.

In 2013, he made his Bollywood debut with Kai Po Che! and went on to star in films such as Shuddh Desi Romance, Raabta, Kedarnath, Sonchiriya and Chhichhore.

But his most prominent role came as cricketer Mahendra Singh Dhoni's in the 2007 biopic, MS Dhoni: The Untold Story.

In a telling tweet, veteran actor Dharmendra wrote despite not knowing Rajput personally, his death served as a reminder that the industry could be "cruel".

"Pyaare Sushant, naa film dekhi na kabhi mila tum se... par tere achaanak chale jaane se bada sadma laga. This beautiful beloved 'show business" is very cruel. I can imagine your unbearable pain. I share the pain of your loving family and friends," Dharmendra wrote.

Actor Meera Chopra penned a powerful, poignant note about the loneliness one feels working in an industry, which is "cold and ruthless".

"We all knew well that Sushant was going through depression since long, but what did we do? Where was his close circle, the directors and producers he's worked with, his close friends? Why nobody came out and helped, gave him the kind of love, the work that he wanted - because nobody cares," she wrote on Twitter.

The Section 375 actor, who has been vocal about feeling suffocated by the constant judgement from the industry colleagues, said nobody in Bollywood cares about what one's going through and artistes are just a flop away from being alienated.

Chopra said the industry has "failed" Rajput and Bollywood will now never be the same.

"True, Bollywood is a small family, but a kind of family which is never there when you need them. He had to take his life for that family to realise the kind of pain and need he was in. An outsider will always feel like an outsider here.

"I just want to say to my industry that help people when they need it, and you know when they need it. There is no point tweeting when they are no more. Don't pretend to be sad when you guys didn't do anything when he was sad. Stop being such a hypocritical society," she added.

Gulshan Devaiah said, as an actor, one could understand why Rajput would've taken the step to end his life.

"As actors, somewhere deep down inside, we think we know why he did it and that’s why it so disturbing even if you didn’t know him at all. It’s a hard game to play and he played it very well but the game won in the end," Devaiah wrote.

Quoting Chopra's tweet, the Mard Ko Dard Nahi Hota star dismissed the idea of Bollywood being a family.

"If one thinks it’s a family, there is the problem. Bollywood is an imaginary name for a place of work, that’s it. I am really not trying to put anybody down here and sorry if it seems," he wrote.

On Sunday, actor-producer Nikhil Dwivedi posted a strongly-worded tweet calling out the "hypocrisy" of the industry after people from the film fraternity wrote they regretted not staying in touch with the "Chhichhore" star.

"High and mighty announcing they should have kept in touch with Sushant. Come on, you didn't! And that's because his career dipped. So STFU! Are you in touch with Imran Khan, Abhay Deol and others? No! But you were, when they were doing well," Dwivedi said.

Similar sentiment was echoed by filmmaker Anubhav Sinha, who, without taking names, said the "Bollywood Privilege Club" must sit down and think hard.

"Now don't ask me to elaborate any further," he tweeted.

Addressing outsiders, filmmaker Hansal Mehta wrote a long thread about the two ends of an artiste's time in the industry - the glorious successes and the crushing lows.

"There are many young 'outsiders' in this industry. Remember this - there is an establishment that will make you feel like the next big thing until they need you. They will drop you and mock you as soon as you falter. Do not fall for the trap. The ones that celebrate you will celebrate your downfall some time later," he tweeted.

Mehta said it's important for those who don't come from a film family to not force themselves to fit in.

"Just be authentic, follow your heart and stop seeking acceptance from anybody. Your connection should be with your art, your craft and with your audience. Nothing else matters. Over the years you will succeed, you will stumble.

"But remember that nothing is more important than you. Look after yourself. And know that you matter. The world is much bigger and wiser than what you perceive. So are opportunities. If you stay they will be yours. Lots of love. Never lose heart," the filmmaker wrote.

Celebrity hairstylist-turned-director Sapna Bhavnani claimed that Rajput's battle with mental health was out in the open and yet the industry chose to look the other way.

"It’s no secret Sushant was going through very tough times for the last few years. No one in the industry stood up for him nor did they lend a helping hand. To tweet today is the biggest display of how shallow the industry really is. No one here is your friend," she wrote on Twitter.

Comments

Add new comment

  • Coastaldigest.com reserves the right to delete or block any comments.
  • Coastaldigset.com is not responsible for its readers’ comments.
  • Comments that are abusive, incendiary or irrelevant are strictly prohibited.
  • Please use a genuine email ID and provide your name to avoid reject.