Growing up Afghanistan: ‘My parents were told to swap me for a boy’

Agencies
December 1, 2018

Kabul, Dec 1: When Nargis Taraki became the fifth girl born to her parents in Afghanistan, her parents were told they should swap her with another baby in the village.

Now 21, she has made it her life ambition to prove they were right to keep her.

Nargis now campaigns for women's education and empowerment in her home country, and is one of the BBC's 2018 100 Women, according to a BBC News report.

"In 1997, I opened my eyes to the world as my parents' fifth child, and their fifth girl," said Nargis.

"My father's sister, and other relatives, immediately put pressure on my mum to agree to my father taking a second wife. Taking a second or even third wife is not uncommon in Afghanistan, and is sometimes done because they believe a new wife could mean a new chance to have a male child."

When she refused, they suggested that my father swap me for a boy. They even found a family in the village who was willing to give their boy away and take me.

Swapping children is not something that is part of our culture, and I haven't heard of it happening before, but boys are more valued in Afghan society as the traditional family breadwinners.

"People deliberately said things to upset my mother and make her feel inferior for not having a son. Despite her refusal to part ways with me, some elders still kept approaching my father. But he had a completely different mentality. He told them he loved me, and he would one day prove to them that a daughter can achieve everything a son can.

"It was not an easy time for my father. He had a military background and a history of service in the previous Soviet-backed regime, and my native district at the time was controlled by people with religious or fundamentalist tendencies.

"So certain people in the village used to detest him and did not socialise with us.

But my father believed in what he said, and he always stood by his word. Although there was pressure on my parents to swap me because I was a girl, it was a man who had the most positive impact on my character.

"Things got worse for us after Taliban militants took control of our district. In 1998, my father had to flee to Pakistan and soon after that we joined him there.

"Life there was not easy - but he managed to get work as a manager in a shoe factory. Perhaps the best thing to happen to my parents whilst in Pakistan was that they finally had a son, followed by my fifth sister.

"In 2001, we all returned to Kabul after the Taliban regime was toppled. We didn't have a house of our own and had to live with my uncles. My sisters and I managed to keep going to school despite conservatism in our culture.

"I went on to study public policy and administration at Kabul University and graduated two years ago with the highest marks for that year. Throughout that time my father never stopped supporting me.

"A couple of years ago I went to watch a cricket game in Kabul with my sister. There weren't many women in the stadium and our photographs and videos were circulated on social media. People started criticising us and leaving negative comments, saying we were shameless to be in a stadium amongst men. Others said we were trying to spread adultery and were being paid by the Americans.

"When my father saw some of the comments on Facebook, he looked at me and said: "My dear. You have done the right thing. I am glad you have annoyed some of these idiots. Life is short. Enjoy it as much as you can."

"My father died of cancer earlier this year. In him, I lost someone whose constant support made me into the person that I am today, and I know he will always be with me.

"Three years ago I tried to open a school for girls in my native village in Ghazni. I talked to my father about it and he said it would be almost impossible because of cultural boundaries, and even boys have difficulties because of the security situation. My father thought giving it a name of a religious madrassa might have improved our chances.

"In the end I was unable to travel to my native village because it was simply too dangerous. One of my sisters and I still hope to achieve this goal one day.

"In the meantime, I volunteered for several years for NGOs in that part of the world, working for women's education, health and empowerment.

I've also presented talks on a girl's right to go to school, university and to get a job.

"I've always dreamed of studying at the University of Oxford one day. When I look at international university rankings I always find Oxford in first or second position, and when I compare that with Kabul University I feel a bit sad - although that's not to say I'm not thankful I was able to go.

"I love to read in my spare time - an average of two to three books a week - and Paolo Coelho is my favourite author.

"In terms of marriage, I would like to choose someone myself and my family have given me permission to marry someone of my own choice.

"It would be great if I can find someone who has the same qualities as my father. I would want to spend the rest of my life with someone who has a similar attitude - who can support me and stand by my choices.

"Family is also important - sometimes you marry the best man out there but then you cannot adapt to his family.

"They will have to support me in what I want to do in my life. If they resist then I will try and change their minds. I believe in what I want to achieve in life and will not compromise.

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News Network
June 17,2020

New Delhi, Jun 17: With an increase of 10,974 new cases and 2,003 deaths in the last 24 hours, India's COVID-19 count reached 3,54,065 on Wednesday while the toll due to the virus stands at 11,903.

This includes 1,55,227 active cases and 1,86,935 cured, discharged and migrated patients, according to the Union Health Ministry.

While the spike in the number of cases has stayed below the 11-thousand mark, the death toll has increased manifold today as compared to the 380 death reported on Tuesday.

Maharashtra with 1,13,445 cases continues to be the worst-affected state in the country with 50,057 active cases while 57,851 patients have been cured and discharged in the state so far. The toll due to COVID-19 has crossed the five thousand mark and reached 5,537 in the state.

It is followed by Tamil Nadu with 48,019 and the national capital with 44,688 confirmed cases.

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Agencies
August 7,2020

Washington, Aug 7: US President Donald Trump on Thursday (local time) signed executive orders halting all transactions with Chinese applications TikTok and WeChat within 45 days, citing national security concerns, further escalating the tensions between Beijing and Washington.

"WeChat, a messaging, social media, and electronic payment application owned by the Chinese company Tencent Holdings Ltd., reportedly has over one billion users worldwide, including users in the United States. Like TikTok, WeChat automatically captures vast swaths of information from its users. 

This data collection threatens to allow the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) access to Americans' personal and proprietary information," Trump said in a statement.

Citing reasons for the ban on WeChat, the US President said that the application captures the personal and proprietary information of Chinese nationals visiting the US, thereby providing the CCP a mechanism to keep tabs on the Chinese citizens who may be "enjoying the benefits of a free society for the first time in their lives".

"In March 2019, a researcher reportedly discovered a Chinese database containing billions of WeChat messages sent from users in not only China but also the United States, Taiwan, South Korea and Australia. WeChat, like TikTok, also reportedly censors content that the CCP deems politically sensitive and may also be used for disinformation campaigns that benefit the CCP. 

These risks have led other countries, including Australia and India, to begin restricting or banning the use of WeChat. The US must take aggressive action against the owner of WeChat to protect our national security," he added.

Earlier, Trump had issued an order banning TikTok as it "reportedly censors content that the CCP deems politically sensitive, such as content concerning protests in Hong Kong and China's treatment of Uighurs and other Muslim minorities. 

TikTok may also be used for disinformation campaigns that benefit the CCP."
US politicians have repeatedly criticised TikTok, owned by Beijing-based startup ByteDance, of being a threat to national security because of its ties to China.

The development comes as China and the US are at loggerheads on a variety of issues including Hong Kong national security law, the South China Sea, the novel coronavirus and trade.

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News Network
March 7,2020

Mumbai, Mar 7: Maharashtra Chief Minister and Shiv Sena president Uddhav Thackeray visited Ayodhya on Saturday to commemorate 100 days in office and pledged Rs 1 crore towards the building of the Ram Temple.

Taking a dig at BJP, Uddhav said his party had separated from its erstwhile ally but not Hindutva.

Recollecting the contribution of his father Balasaheb Thackeray, uddhav said he was forced to skip the Sarayu River 'aarti' due to Coronavirus fears but he would continue visiting Ayodhya.

Earlier in the day, the Sena, which heads the tripartite dispensation in the state, said there was no change in its ideology.

Launching a veiled attack on BJP, an editorial in the Sena mouthpiece 'Saamana' also said that Lord Ram and Hindutva is not the sole property of any single political party.

The Sena also said the Maha Vikas Aghadi (MVA) government — which also comprises the NCP and the Congress — has completed 100 days, much to the chagrin of those who were claiming that the new dispensation will not survive more than 100 hours.

“Those whose government lasted for 80 hours were claiming that the Thackeray regime will not last for even 100 hours. But this MVA government not only thrived but has instilled trust in the minds of people during this period with its performance,” the editorial said.

The Sena was apparently referring to the second inning of the erstwhile Devendra Fadnavis government which lasted for only 80 hours in November last year.

"Hence, CM Thackeray's visit to Ayodhya has to be welcomed as he is offering the flowers of works (done by the government) at the feet of Lord Shriram," it said.

The Sena said Thackeray's visit to the temple town is out of devotion for Lord Shriram. "The government in Maharashtra comprising three ideologically different parties is working as per Constitution and Thackeray is leading such government," it said.

The edit said on this background various questions were raised over Thackeray's visit to Ayodhya by his political opponents. "The government maybe backed by anyone, but Uddhav Thackeray and the Shiv Sena remain the same from within and outside. There is no change in the ideology. Lord Shriram and Hindutva is not the property of any single party," it stated.

Referring to senior RSS leader Suresh 'Bhaiyyaji' Joshi's remark that the Hindu community is not synonymous with the BJP and that opposing the BJP does not amount to opposing Hindus, the Sena said similarly Ayodhya belongs to all.

"The political and cultural battle in Ayodhya is now over. The Supreme Court cannot be thanked enough for this (for its verdict in the Ram Janmabhoomi-Babri Masjid dispute case that allowed construction of the Ram temple)," it said.

Hailing the Supreme Court's November, 2019 verdict, the Sena said the country had to fight a big battle to prove that Ayodhya belonged to Lord Shriram.

"In that battle, several (people) were unmasked. But only (late) Shiv Sena president Balasaheb Thackeray stood behind the Ayodhya (temple) campaigners like a mountain," it said.

Bal Thackeray created trust among Hindus from across the world about the creation of the temple, the Sena said. The party further said late Thackeray's assertion that he was proud if the Babri mosque was razed by Sena workers and that the temple of Lord Ram would come up in Ayodhya was akin to the thunder of "thousands of lightnings" in the sky.

"The Hindu culture got lit up in the glow of that lightning. The resplendent rays showed the path of power to the Hindu community. Hence, no one can deny the contribution of the 'Hinduhridaysamrat' (Bal Thackeray) as good as that of Lord Shriram, in creating the current political order in the country," the Sena said.

"We have experienced several times that Balasaheb lives in the mind of Ayodhya. Now Uddhav Thackeray himself is going there with the same faith. He had gone there when not in power. He is going there now after becoming chief minister with the same humility. Lord Shriram is of everyone," the Sena said.

The party said Maharashtra is being run on the path shown by Lord Shriram and Chhatrapati Shivaji Maharaj. "A Ram Rajya entails fulfilling promises made to the people. This is precisely what Mahatma Gandhi wanted, and the government following this ideology is in place in Maharashtra. It will continue work on that line. Ultimately, Lord Shriram is there to support it," the Sena said.

Thackeray completed 100 days in the office on Friday. He had assumed office as the chief minister of the Sena-led Maha Vikas Aghadi (MVA) government on November 28 last year, after the Sena joined hands with the NCP and the Congress.

Senior Sena leader Sanjay Raut had said that Thackeray will not take part in the 'aarti' programme on the banks of river Sarayu in the temple town.

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