Growing up Afghanistan: ‘My parents were told to swap me for a boy’

Agencies
December 1, 2018

Kabul, Dec 1: When Nargis Taraki became the fifth girl born to her parents in Afghanistan, her parents were told they should swap her with another baby in the village.

Now 21, she has made it her life ambition to prove they were right to keep her.

Nargis now campaigns for women's education and empowerment in her home country, and is one of the BBC's 2018 100 Women, according to a BBC News report.

"In 1997, I opened my eyes to the world as my parents' fifth child, and their fifth girl," said Nargis.

"My father's sister, and other relatives, immediately put pressure on my mum to agree to my father taking a second wife. Taking a second or even third wife is not uncommon in Afghanistan, and is sometimes done because they believe a new wife could mean a new chance to have a male child."

When she refused, they suggested that my father swap me for a boy. They even found a family in the village who was willing to give their boy away and take me.

Swapping children is not something that is part of our culture, and I haven't heard of it happening before, but boys are more valued in Afghan society as the traditional family breadwinners.

"People deliberately said things to upset my mother and make her feel inferior for not having a son. Despite her refusal to part ways with me, some elders still kept approaching my father. But he had a completely different mentality. He told them he loved me, and he would one day prove to them that a daughter can achieve everything a son can.

"It was not an easy time for my father. He had a military background and a history of service in the previous Soviet-backed regime, and my native district at the time was controlled by people with religious or fundamentalist tendencies.

"So certain people in the village used to detest him and did not socialise with us.

But my father believed in what he said, and he always stood by his word. Although there was pressure on my parents to swap me because I was a girl, it was a man who had the most positive impact on my character.

"Things got worse for us after Taliban militants took control of our district. In 1998, my father had to flee to Pakistan and soon after that we joined him there.

"Life there was not easy - but he managed to get work as a manager in a shoe factory. Perhaps the best thing to happen to my parents whilst in Pakistan was that they finally had a son, followed by my fifth sister.

"In 2001, we all returned to Kabul after the Taliban regime was toppled. We didn't have a house of our own and had to live with my uncles. My sisters and I managed to keep going to school despite conservatism in our culture.

"I went on to study public policy and administration at Kabul University and graduated two years ago with the highest marks for that year. Throughout that time my father never stopped supporting me.

"A couple of years ago I went to watch a cricket game in Kabul with my sister. There weren't many women in the stadium and our photographs and videos were circulated on social media. People started criticising us and leaving negative comments, saying we were shameless to be in a stadium amongst men. Others said we were trying to spread adultery and were being paid by the Americans.

"When my father saw some of the comments on Facebook, he looked at me and said: "My dear. You have done the right thing. I am glad you have annoyed some of these idiots. Life is short. Enjoy it as much as you can."

"My father died of cancer earlier this year. In him, I lost someone whose constant support made me into the person that I am today, and I know he will always be with me.

"Three years ago I tried to open a school for girls in my native village in Ghazni. I talked to my father about it and he said it would be almost impossible because of cultural boundaries, and even boys have difficulties because of the security situation. My father thought giving it a name of a religious madrassa might have improved our chances.

"In the end I was unable to travel to my native village because it was simply too dangerous. One of my sisters and I still hope to achieve this goal one day.

"In the meantime, I volunteered for several years for NGOs in that part of the world, working for women's education, health and empowerment.

I've also presented talks on a girl's right to go to school, university and to get a job.

"I've always dreamed of studying at the University of Oxford one day. When I look at international university rankings I always find Oxford in first or second position, and when I compare that with Kabul University I feel a bit sad - although that's not to say I'm not thankful I was able to go.

"I love to read in my spare time - an average of two to three books a week - and Paolo Coelho is my favourite author.

"In terms of marriage, I would like to choose someone myself and my family have given me permission to marry someone of my own choice.

"It would be great if I can find someone who has the same qualities as my father. I would want to spend the rest of my life with someone who has a similar attitude - who can support me and stand by my choices.

"Family is also important - sometimes you marry the best man out there but then you cannot adapt to his family.

"They will have to support me in what I want to do in my life. If they resist then I will try and change their minds. I believe in what I want to achieve in life and will not compromise.

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News Network
June 2,2020

Washington, Jun 2: US President Donald Trump said that peaceful protests following the death of African-American man George Floyd in police custody were derailed by acts of domestic terrorism.

"These are not acts of peaceful protests, these are acts of domestic terror - the destruction of innocent life, and the spilling of innocent blood is an offence to humanity and a crime against God," Trump said during a press briefing on Monday.

Trump also added that the chaos is the work of professional agitators and provocateurs - anarchists and the far-left movement Antifa, among others - and put them on notice, vowing to enforce law and order.

He further said, "Those who threaten innocent life and property will be arrested, detained and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. I want the organizers of this terror to be on notice that you will face severe criminal penalties and lengthy sentences in jail. This includes Antifa and others who are leading instigators."

The US president also that he is invoking an 1807 law to mobilize the military around the country to "quickly solve the problem."

"I am also taking swift and decisive action to protect our capital Washington DC. As we speak, I am dispatching thousands and thousands of heavily armed soldier, military personnel and enforcement officers to stop the rioting," Trump said during a press briefing.

"I am mobilizing all available federal resources, civilian and military, to stop the rioting and looting, to end the destruction and arson. And to protect the rights of law-abiding Americans, including your Second Amendment rights," he added.

Trump said mayors and governors must establish an "overwhelming law enforcement presence until the violence has been quelled." If the city or state refuses to take the actions, Trump said he would deploy the US military.

Trump on Monday also said that all Americans are rightly 'sickened by the brutal death' of George Floyd and his administration is fully committed to providing justice to George and his family.

"All Americans were rightly sickened and revolted by the brutal death of George Floyd. My administration is fully committed, the justice will be fully served for George and his family and He will not have died in vain," Trump said.

"My first and highest duty as president is to defend and protect the great country and the American people. I have sworn an oath to uphold the laws of our nation and that is exactly what I will do," he added.

After the media address, Trump made a surprise visit to the damaged St Johns church near White House, walking through park violently cleared of protesters. He walked to the church across the street from the White House after tear gas was fired at protesters in the area.

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News Network
March 4,2020

London, Mar 4: The UK government has reiterated its concern over the potential impact of the Citizenship Amendment Act (CAA) and said it is continuing to follow the events in India closely.

In response to an urgent question on “Recent Violence in India” tabled by Pakistani-origin Opposition Labour Party MP Khalid Mahmood in the House of Commons on Tuesday, UK’s Minister of State in the Foreign and Commonwealth Office (FCO) Nigel Adams said the UK engages with India at all levels, including on human rights, and also referred to the country's "proud history" of inclusive government and religious tolerance.

"The UK government also have concerns about the potential impact of the legislation (CAA),” said Adams, the Minister for Asia who was standing in for UK Foreign Secretary Dominic Raab, who is on a visit to Turkey.

"It is because of our close relationship with the government of India that we are able to discuss difficult issues with them and make clear our concerns where we have them, including on the rights of minorities. We will continue to follow events closely and to raise our concerns when we have with them,” said the minister.

While Mahmood, who had tabled the urgent question for an FCO statement, described the government response as “facile”, another Pakistani-origin MP Nusrat Ghani called on the government to relay the UK Parliament's concerns to the Indian authorities.

British Sikh Labour MP Tanmanjeet Singh Dhesi said the violence had brought back “painful personal memories” from the 1984 Sikh riots while he was studying in India and fellow Sikh MP Preet Kaur Gill also referenced 1984 in her intervention.

Other MPs sought to highlight the steps taken by the Indian authorities to restore “peace and tranquillity” in Delhi.

“He will be aware that it is not just Muslims who have been killed; Hindus have also been killed as part of the riots,” said Conservative Party MP Bob Blackman.

Scottish National Party (SNP) MP Alyn Smith sought the UK government’s intervention to share best practice around countering the online disinformation campaign being used in India to “inflame tensions”.

“We are in constant contact on these issues, and we know how important this is to Members of Parliament and their constituents, who may have family in the area,” said Adams, in his response.

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News Network
July 5,2020

New Delhi, Jul 5: With highest-ever single-day spike of 24,850 COVID-19 cases in 24 hours, India's coronavirus count stood at 6,73,165, informed the Union Ministry of Health and Family Welfare on Sunday.

Out of the total cases, 2,44,814 are active cases. On the other hand, India's cured/discharged patients count crossed the 4 lakh mark with 4,09,082 patients cured/discharged and one patient migrated.

As many as 613 deaths due to coronavirus were reported in the country in the last 24 hours taking the death toll in the country to 19,268.

Meanwhile, the ministry said that collective and focused efforts for containment and management of COVID-19 by the government of India along with the States/UTs have led to the number of recovered cases among COVID-19 patients rise to 4,09,082 as of today.

"During the last 24 hours, a total of 14,856 COVID-19 patients have been cured. So far, there are 1,64,268 more recovered patients than COVID-19 active cases. This takes the national recovery rate amongst COVID-19 patients to 60.77 per cent," the ministry said.

"With 786 labs in government sector and 314 private labs, there are as many as 1,100 labs in India," it added.

As per the Health Ministry, coronavirus cases in Maharashtra -- the worst affected state from the infection -- has breached the 2 lakh mark with 2,00,064 cases including 8,671 deaths.

Tamil Nadu reported 4,150 fresh COVID-19 cases and 60 deaths today, taking total cases to 1,11,151 and death toll to 1,510. Number of active cases stands at 46,860, according to the State Health Department.

Delhi's coronavirus tally nears the 1 lakh mark with 99,444 cases and the number of people succumbing to the virus stands at 3,067 in the national capital. As many as 9,873 RT-PCR tests and 13,263 rapid antigen tests were conducted today in Delhi. Total tests done so far stands at 6,43,504.

Meanwhile, Indian Council of Medical Research informed that the total number of samples tested up to July 4 is 97,89,066 of which 2,48,934 samples were tested yesterday.

There were seven new COVID-19 cases in the last 24 hours in Chandigarh, taking total cases to 466 including 395 recoveries and six deaths.
Himachal Pradesh Health Department informed that COVID-19 cases reach 1,048 in the state, of which, 309 cases are active and 715 have recovered.

Andhra Pradesh has reported 998 new COVID-19 cases and 14 deaths in the last 24 hours, according to a media bulletin released by AP state COVID nodal officer.

A total of 1,155 COVID-19 cases were reported in the last 24 hours in Uttar Pradesh on Sunday, taking the total number of active cases to 8,161 in the state, an official said. According to the official data, a total of 18,761 people have been cured while 785 people have died due to the virus in the state.

Eighteen more personnel of Indo-Tibetan Border Police (ITBP) tested positive for COVID-19 in the last 24 hours. There are total 151 active cases and 270 have recovered till date.

While, in the last 24 hours, 36 more Border Security Force (BSF) personnel tested positive for COVID-19 and 33 have recovered. There are 526 active cases and 817 personnel have recovered till date.

In Rajasthan, 224 fresh COVID-19 positive cases and 6 deaths were reported today. The total number of cases rose to 19,756 including 3,640 active cases and 453 deaths.

Odisha reported 469 new COVID19 positive cases in the last 24 hours, taking the total number of positive cases in the state to 9,070 including 5,934 recovered cases and 3,090 active cases, according to the health department.

Uttarakhand reported 31 new COVID-19 cases in the last 24 hours, taking total cases to 3,124. Recovery rate among COVID-19 patients stands at 80.79 per cent.

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